Sitting at Charles de Gaulle, Paris

Sitting here in the airport in Paris, for my layover. Fun stuff. Tried to upload a picture (the Hokies out there will appreciate it) using my USB connector, but it didn't seem to work and the error message was in French, so don't know what the problem is. Hopefully I don't run into that the whole trip, it would suck to have to wait till the end of the trip to be able to share photos, that's soooo far away. So something I noticed about this airport, there are no restaurants anywhere. And I only saw one place that had food to buy. I mean, I'm trying to eat breakfast people! All it is, is duty free. No I don't want purfume, or liquor, I want real food. Grrr. Ahh well, I'll see you all in Istanbul!

PS - I am kinda freaking out that I will be gone for 33 days, what the hell was I thinking? That's so long, but it'll be great, I know it will!

I am lazy

So here I am, 2 months after my last post. I wish I could say it was because I've been so busy, I haven't had time to update, but that's just not true. Truth is I'm just lazy.

I do however have lots of news, big changes are in store in my life. I did officially submit my resignation at work. My last day is September 10th, and of course I leave for my trip on September 12th. I only have 7 days of work left at ATCC then I am gone for good. I still can't hardly believe it. But I am getting excited for my trip, in 2 weeks I will be in Turkey! I have most of the plans I can make ahead of time, taken care of. All my accommodations in Turkey, my flight in Turkey, my flight from Istanbul to Odessa, my apartment I'm renting in Budapest. Other then that, I am going to go with the flow and see how things take me. A little daunting, but exciting. It will be nice not to have to have an exact set schedule. And traveling alone gives you that extra flexibility to travel where the wind takes you.

After I return from my trip, I have no plans yet. I am still keen on the idea of moving to Buenos Aires, but I have no distinct plans yet. It interesting when people ask me what I'm doing and I tell them I don't know, that I want to move abroad, knowing no one, having no job, and not knowing the language that well. The response to that is sometimes mixed, but overall it's been mostly positive. I think secretly most people wish they could do that, just take off somewhere with no plans, no responsibilities and just live. Most people are excited for me, saying they wish they could do that themselves but have too many responsibilities. Which is exactly my point, I need to do this now, while I still can. While I am young enough "to get away with it." Before I get stuck where I am and have regrets. I am going to figure everything out when I return from Europe. Since I live at home, it will be OK to spend a month or so getting plans in order, it's not like I have a lot of expenses.

So what else is new with me, not a whole hell of a lot. Basically this trip and subsequent plans are all I have going for me right now, which is all the more reason why I need to get out of here and get a life!

I did it!

I booked my plane tickets for Eastern Europe in September! This is HUGE. Why you ask, it's just a little vacay. It's so much more than that. I am leaving September 12th, on my way to Istanbul and leaving from Budapest on October 15th. That is 33 days of being in Eastern Europe. There is no way I would be allowed to take that much vacation from work, so the fact that I just booked it means I am definitely going to be quitting my job! I just got to the point that I was so tired of talking about it, I just wanted to do it. So now since I will be quitting my job, I will definitely be moving somewhere. I didn't want that to become something I talked about always wanting to do and never did. Until I booked the plane tickets I could always chicken out and decide to only spend 2 weeks and just visit Eileen in Ukraine as opposed to doing the whole touring around Eastern Europe thing, then come back to my job. But now it's done, I will officially be in Eastern Europe for over a month. I will officially be quitting my job. I WILL be moving out of Northern Virginia (for a while at least). These are huge steps in my life and I look forward to what adventures the future will bring.

Sometimes I wish I had a job where people knew what I did

Now I like biology, don't get me wrong, after all I did get a degree in it, but sometimes I wish I had a job where people know what in the hell I did. Accountant, salesperson, engineer, whatever. I think the single most asked question I get is...so what do you actually do? And here's the answer: I work in quality control for bacteriology at bioresources company. What does that mean? Am I curing cancer...no. Am I making drugs...no. Here it is in hopefully understandable lingo.

My company is a production based company, we make products for other companies/people to buy and use. The department I work in makes bacteria. What the hell do people need bacteria? We sell to research institutions (so people can develop vaccines and what not), clinical (hospitals and what not), pharmaceutical, universities, food industry, etc. The production department grows the bacteria and then vials it, then it is freeze dried. Before we can send this product to the customer, it has to come through me. I check to make sure everything is A-OK. I make sure that if we are supposed to be sending them E. coli, they are getting E. coli and not Salmonella. I make sure the culture is viable, that when the customer receives it, it will grow. This requires a bunch of testing via different methods, biochemical testing, genomic testing (through DNA and RNA), etc. Then if I say it's ok, I pass it and it gets sent out to whoever wants it.

What kind of things do I work with? E. coli, Salmonella, MRSA, Streptoccous (cause strep throat), Neisseria gonorrhoeae (cause gonorrhea), Bordetella (whooping cough), Mycobacerium (tuberculosis), Helicobacter (cause ulcers), Vibrio (cholera), as well as bacteria that cause meningitis, botulism, tetanus, lyme disease, etc. We also have (but I don't work with) anthrax and plaque. As well as working with a whole range of non-disease causing bacteria.

It's sometimes hard for people to understand what I actually do and why I do it. That can get soooo frustrating. Why do I bring this up? I bring it up because me brother Craig works as a store manager of a high-end shoe store. My mom and dad went into his store a couple weeks ago to visit and buy some shoes. My dad already always talked about how he was at the number one store, then they moved him to a store in trouble and now he's turned it around and made it the number one store and this is how much he sells, and profits and numbers and blah, blah, blah. Now that they've been to his store, my dad raves to people about how he was so great with customers and diffused a tense situation and even go this guy to buy another pair of shoes. It's all about numbers. This makes sense though, people know about this. Everyone's been to a store, everyone buys things. It's easy to explain about numbers and how the profit it going and seeing how the employee's work with customers. Therefore my dad is always gloating about how great Craig is doing in his job. I swear if I hear about how great he is one more time, I am going to shoot myself. I never hear about my dad gloating about how I finished 10 work orders this week or got that difficult Clostridium to finally grow. That's why I say sometimes I wish I had a job where people knew what I did and understood it and could appreciate how much hard work I am putting in and what difference I am making. Because when people don't know what you do or why then it's tough to explain and get that recognition and appreciation that I'm sure all of us crave at some point in time.

I hate when people ask you how you're doing

This is my beloved cat, Tomahawk. On Thursday June 12, 2008 we had to have him put to sleep. It was one of the saddest days of my life. He was the love of my life, my lovey, my cuddle buddy. It was something that had to be done though. He was 16 years old and age was finally getting to him. In the past 6 weeks, he'd stopped eating, except for a few bites here and there. Sometimes I could get him to eat tuna fish out of my hand, but it was never very much. Then he started walking awkwardly, like he was drunk. Very unsteady, he wasn't able to jump up to the couch or beds anymore. He just laid around all lethargic and with no spark in his eyes. Then in the past few days, he stopped drinking water as well, which he had been doing up until then. We decided on Wednesday that is was time, we couldn't bare to see him like this anymore. And on Wednesday night and Thursday morning, he was so weak, he couldn't even walk anymore. He just looked so sad and uncomfortable. He just wasn't the cat we had loved for 16 years. He had wasted away to practically nothing, you could feel every bone in his vertebrae. So we took him in on Thursday morning to bring an end to his misery. Of course I couldn't go back to work that afternoon. I am devastated. I feel empty and so alone. I just didn't want to talk to anyone.
It made me think. I hate how when you see people in passing they say hi, then out of courtesy , people ask you how you are. What in the hell are you supposed to say to that? Most people just say fine or good. Or perhaps state some common feeling, oh, I'm tired or So glad it's Friday. What are you supposed to say when you feel like your heart has broken in two? You can't exactly say, oh, I'm fine,because your NOT. You can't exactly respond with, well actually I'm heartbroken, I feel like I just want to cry for 5 hours. How do you think the person would respond? That is obviously not the response they are looking for. And if you do tell them you feel crappy, then they may want to know about it and maybe you don't feel like talking about why you feel like crap, because it just hurts too much. In all honesty you know the person doesn't really care anyway how you are, it's just something we say to each other to pretend like we care, I bet half the time the person asking doesn't even pay attention to the response. So why do we say it, why do we ask how another person is? The majority of people don't genuinely care. There, I hate this question. I wish we as a society could find something else to say to each other then a half-hearted "Hi, how are you?"
On a side note, today was my 3rd anniversary at ATCC, fell on Friday the 13th. Anyone feel like this is an omen. Everyone was shocked I had been there 3 years (4 if you count when I started as an intern, but of course I didn't work for the full 12 months then), because 3 years is forever to stay at ATCC in Bacteriology. I am the second most senior person in my area. I have been there longer than all the people in BioProduction (I'm in QC) and longer than the majority of the people in R&D. I am in charge of my area, it's kind of crazy (although I'm not getting paid to be in charge but doing the work, boo). When I started I said I wanted to work here 2-3 years, get me experience, then move on. Well we're at years, but I am working on a plan to get out of here. As I may have mentioned earlier, I would like to move abroad for a year or so. That's always been a life goal, to life abroad, so now that I made my goal, it's the time to do it. Anyway, happy anniversary to me!



RIP Tomahawk Ferguson June 1992 - June 12, 2008 I loved you more then I could ever express and you will always hold a place in my heart.

Johnny Depp...still hot

Here comes a really random statement. I'm watching the MTV Movie Awards and they are presenting for best comedic performance and the winner is announced as Johnny Depp. Well, one would think, yeah, he's probably not there, got better things to do, being a "serious" actor and all. Well you wold be wrong, he strolls out on stage to accept the award. Gets a huuuuuge standing ovation, apparently everyone there loooves him. My first thought is, damn, does he look goooood. His hair was a little uh, but he was actually clean shaven and I swear looked like did back in the 21 Jump Street days. He looks so much better clean then when he's sporting the beatnik off the street look. It definitely renewed an appreciation for him. So anyway, just wanted to say, Johnny Depp...still hot after all these years.

Are there any real women like the ones on "Sex and the City"?

So I recently signed up for Netflix and some of the first DVD’s I got sent to me were episodes of “Sex and the City.” With the movie up I had to try and get into the mood, right. Besides, I’ve only ever seen this show on TBS and The CW, so they’re all altered and dubbed and not the original way they were meant to be seen. So I figured, why not, I’ll watch some of the original versions.
Now I’m a fan of the show, but as I’m watching it the other night, I began to think about a question that had been posed to me earlier that day. Do people in real life behave like the women on this show? Now I know what you’re saying, it’s a SHOW. You can’t compare it to real life. I’m not talking about the actual situations and plots, but rather the candid nature of their language and subject matter. Perhaps my friends and I are prude, but I have never seen women in real life talk about sex in such explicit detail and have no fear about discussing their love lives. Don’t get me wrong, we talk about men, but not have I been exposed to such candid language. To those women, no subject is off limits. Even with my closest friends, I still feel like there are certain things that I wouldn’t feel comfortable discussing. Perhaps that’s why this show was so popular, women get exposed to conversations they wouldn’t normally have or hear. It’s like Cosmo on tv.
Anyway, that was my random thought of the day. Do you know or are you one of these women who talk so candidly about sex?

3 months huh...it's because I have no life

So it’s been over 3 months since I blogged on this darn thing. It’s really because I don’t really have much to say or much going on, but I am going to try to be more vigilant, because I’m sure there are sooo many of you who actually care. I guess it’s more for my piece of mind, to vent things, ya know?

Well first of all, I took my trip to Munich in March and had a fabulous time!!!! I have some great pics that I want to upload, but can’t do it right now seeing as though I am at work. See how productive I am being? But I will post soon and talk about the trip.

What I am thinking about right now is how every time I turn around, someone else is engaged, or getting married, or having kids, or buying a house. And I am doing none of those things. I’m living at home with my parents (still…but it’s sooo close to work and so much more affordable), no man, no kids (thank goodness, I’m not even close to that point in my life yet, too much I want to do), and not buying a place because I want to get the hell out of here. I just sometimes feel like I’m still a kid, instead of getting up and going to school, I am getting up and going to work. Other than that, it’s not much different. I feel like all these people my age and younger than me are starting their “adult” lives, moving on, and here I am, wondering when the hell my life is going to start. I mean, I am 25, I have a good job at a very reputable company and I just feel like I am standing still, sinking into this place of being stuck somewhere I am never going to get out of. I don't want to live in Northern Virginia for my whole life. I don't mind it...sometimes, but I just want to get out and experience other things before I decide on somewhere to settle. I have some life to-do's and it's about damn time I start trying to accomplish some of them.

That being said I have some exciting things coming up in my life that I am planning on doing. First, I'm going to go visit my friend Eileen, who is in the Peace Corps and in Ukraine right now. So I figure since I am over there, why not hit up a couple places in Eastern Europe while I am there. My plan right now is to spend a month from mid-Sept. to Mid-Oct. playing tourist in Europe. I would like to fly into Istanbul, spend a couple days there, then ferry across the Black Sea to Odessa, Ukraine. Spend a week at Eileen's village a couple hours outside of Odessa. Travel to Kiev and Lvov, Ukraine, cross the border into Krakow, Poland, down to the Tatras in Slovakia, then to Vienna, Austria with a stop in Bratislava, Slovakia, then end up in Budapest, Hungary. Well at least that's the plan right now. If any one's been there and has any insight on what I must see or do, please let me know.

Now you must be asking, how in the hell can you take a month off from work to explore Eastern Europe. Well then answer is that I don't plan on being employed at that time. What?! You say. Why not. We'll you know how I mentioned that I had a bunch of things I wanted to do in my life? Living abroad for a year is one of them. I figure this is the perfect time for it. All those things I was bitching about earlier, not being in a relationship, not having a place of my own, etc,the lack of those things makes it a perfect time to take a leap and try something new. In 3 weeks I celebrate my 3 year anniversary at my company. When I first started I said I wanted to make it 2-3 years then move on, get the experience under my belt and then peace out. Well I'm at that point and it may be now or never at this point. Plus I have quite a bit of responsibility in my lab, I am the team leader. Which means, everybody is constantly asking me questions, I get yelled at when things don't work, I have to take care of shit responsibilities, because I am "in charge." Being in charge is so not what it's cracked up to be. A lot of times it just means being the scapegoat and the bitch at the same time. This promotion was supposed to come with a raise which I got my paperwork in for last JUNE and still have not received yet. So I am doing a harder job that I am not getting paid for , awesome right? Anyway, back to the whole moving abroad thing. So yeah, come end of October/beginning of November I would like to move abroad. My thought right now is Buenos Aires, Argentina. I know some Spanish and can brush up on it and try to become fluent perhaps (being fluent in another language = another thing on the life to-do list). It's a cosmopolitan city, the cost of living is still affordable.

So that is what I am thinking right now. All I do know though is, I need to get out of Manassas, out of Northern Virginia, see more of the world and get out of this rut I seem to be stuck in.

Pictures of my laboratory

Here are some pics of the lab I work in.

My bench space. Notice how clean and lovely it is.

My desk space, hey, this is clean for me. Usually it's a lot worse! It means I'm important!

The hood, or it's proper name, the Biological Safety Cabinet that I play with my bacteria in.

The lab from my desk, although I cut out half the lab on the left side of the picture.

Hatred for Kanye West and...Wine Tasting?

So can I for one second express how much I loathe Kanye West? He is a whinny, immature punk ass little bitch. Always whining about how whinnung about what he should have won, when he should have performed and how much better he is then everyone. He just has this attitude that he should be entitled and receive more than everyone else and that he is God's gift the planet, which pf course, he is not. Now, I feel bad about his mom and all, I mean, noone wants to see another person lose someone they love. I mean, he wins the freaking grammy and babbles about stupid shit, then yell at the people for starting to play the music BEFORE he even even gets to talk about his mom. There is no reason you should get way more time than anyone else. If you want to dedicate it to your mom and give her an emotional shoutout, do it right when you get up there, don't babble about dumb shit then after they've already started to play the music, start to talk about your mom. It's like he waited till the end to talk about her because he knew they wouldn't cut him off when talking about his dead mother and that way he'd get to talk longer. He is just such a prick and so full of himself I can't even stand it.

Anyway, so that rant is over. Well, what have I been up to? Spending time with the fam, doing things. Went skiing with my dad, went to the Air and Space Museum out by Dulles Airport (Udvar-Hazy) with my bro, neice, nephew, mum and dad, and went wine tasting with the rents.

My niece, Caitlin. She's looking at me like, crazy lady, what are you doing?

Dad, Liam (my nephew) and Cailtin at the Udvar-Hazy Center.

Prince Michel Winery


Horton Winery - they had 40 different wines to try! I only tried about 10 though. The wine glass that I took home from here had a cat on it and said "Cats understand. They don't care, but they understand." I thought that was so great and true!

I love this building!

Me outside Horton Winery

The 'rents at Barboursville Winery














Me at Barboursville

Me at the Barboursville Ruins









We went to another winery next, Burnley, but the outside wasn't much to write home about so no pictures there. I did buy a yummy peach wine from there though!

Our fifth and final stop, Keswick.

It was a great day for wine-tasting, weather wise and we had a fantastic time!

It's My Birthday! I'm 25!

So today is my 25th birthday and I got mistaken for a high schooler. Isn't that grand?

Well let's start with the beginning of the day. I walk into work to see the BacT/ALERT (a critical piece of equipment) beeping and flashing with all sorts of error messages. Come to find out, the power has gone out yesterday evening and the damn battery that is supposed to back this thing up has a piece broken so it didn't do it's job. We have 120 samples on this damn thing so this isn't exactly good news. So I proceed to spend the whole day on the phone finding out how to fix it, trying to track down a service agreement to get it fixed, deciding how to proceed with the samples in the machine, checking the graph on the computer for all the samples and starting to write a deviation form for EVERY item in the damn machine. Basically it took up my whole damn day.

Oh, and we went out to lunch at Potbelly. Therese insists that she pay for my lunch, ok, fine. We get to the register and her card isn't working, turns out she lost her credit card and had to deactivate it, and at the same time the credit card was deactivated, the debit card was deactivated too. Alas, she didn't bring her purse and had no other card. Well, I have my purse so I whip it out to pay. Not only did I pay for my own lunch but I paid for Therese's lunch too. Awesome.

My evening plans including going to dinner with my old gymnastics coach then going to the gymnastics district meet. While I am there I am approached by a high school kid and asked, "Are you from Battlefield?"
"No" I reply.
"Which school do you go to?" He then asks.
I respond with "Nowhere, I graduated."
Let me tell you, it really made me feel fantastic. I mean, I know I look young, but seriously, I'm 25. I'd like to think that I at least carry myself with a bit more of a mature and adult air then some punk ass high school kid.

So pretty much all in all it was a pretty crappy ass birthday. Especially after last year when I was in Belize swinging through trees on a zip line and floating on a river through a cave on an inter tube. I guess it wouldn't have been so bad if I at least had someone to spend my day with, a man, or even a good friend, but alas, no. People are busy or far away. Maybe next year. Man, I feel like I'd be so much farther ahead in my life at this point than I am. I still feel like I'm a kid, but on the other hand I feel like such an adult, it's a weird, disconcerting feeling. Confusing, very confusing.

But hey, at least I can rent a car now without paying exorbitant extra fees.

Happy Birthday to me.

2 days till I'm 25!

Well I haven’t pasted on here since I first created it and I’d like to claim that I’ve been so busy with work and extracurricular activities that I just haven’t had time. Sadly that is not the case. Reality is, I just have no life and have nothing to talk about. Sad huh?

One bit of good news though is that Glynnis finally moved to the area! Yay, I have another friend to spend time with! Makes me feel like slightly less of a loser, slightly. Hopefully she won’t be too busy with work and volunteering and what not to actually see me.

Well my birthday is coming up in 2 days. I turn the big 2-5. Quarter century. Wow, a little freaky actually. Not that I feel old or anything, but it just makes me think, wow, I actually am an adult. It also depresses me because I feel like I should be farther along in my life than I am. Not that my life is bad, by any means. I have a good job I’ve been at for 2 ½ years, with a very reputable company in the biological science field. I’ve risen up and am the team leader for my area. I’m well respected at my company. I’ve got to travel to quite a few places for work and give presentations to Ph. D’s and other intellectual types. I’ve been to Belize, Mexico, the Caymans, Las Vegas, Toronto, Austin, TX, Miami and Chicago in the last 15 months. That’s really not too damn bad when you think about it.

But on the other hand I feel like I’m still in high school. I still live at home, which I realize a lot of people my age in this area do, it’s just too darn expensive to rent a place on your own. And why pay hundreds of dollars to live somewhere else when I can live at home (granted I do pay rent there), and be 10 minutes away from work?

Also it seems as though every time I turn around, someone my age, or younger, is getting engaged, or married, or gulp, having kids. And here I am, alone, as lonely as can be, with no prospects even on the horizon. I’m not saying I want to get married right now, because that’s not the case. I just feel as if everyone around me is growing up, moving on, starting their “real life” and here I am, stuck in the same place, waiting and wondering when the hell I’m gonna grow up and have a life. I’m afraid of just waking up one day, being 40, being alone and wondering what the hell happened to the life I wanted to lead.

I wonder, does anyone else feel the same way?

My First Blog Post

So I've decided to join the ever growing number of persons with, glup, a a blog. Why you ask? Well I guess it's so people who I've grown apart from, friends I talk to all the time and anybody else can know what's going on with me. Not that it's that exciting, my life is pretty boring really, but hey, why not.

So what is up with me you ask? Good question. Well, after I graduated in 2005 from Virginia Tech with my degree in Biology I started working for ATCC (The American Type Culture Collection) here in Manassas, VA. I work in the Bacteriology Quality Control Department as a Team Leader/Biologist. Some time I spend working with bacteria, growing it, testing it, giving it my stamp of approval. The bacteria is then bought by research institutions, universities, pharmaceutical companies, food companies, etc. Also being a Team Leader means I deal with a lot of people. People with questions, people with complaints, upper level management, people who need things, etc. I am a middle person between my boss and the other 7 people that work in my area. There are days I hate it and love it, but overall it''s a good job to have. Hours are pretty flexible, I'm not stuck in a cubicle (I have a desk and a lab bench) and it's a great company to have on a resume in the science world, oh and it's close to home.

Ahh, yes, home. I do still live at home with my parents, with can be a big pain in the ass, but hey, I am saving a ton of money, which will give me the opportunity to do other things I want to do, like travel.

Speaking of traveling, my biggest news of lately is that I am heading to Munich, Germany come March 13-18th. I've always loved to travel and want to see as many places as possible (went to Brazil at 18, studied in South Africa in college). My biggest problem post-college has been the lack of a travel buddy. Living at home, I have money and can take time off, but all of my good friends are in grad school and have no money or time or in the Peace Corps (Eileen!) so I have no one to travel with. I’d been thinking for a while about going somewhere solo, just biting the bullet and saying, forget a travel buddy! I figure, the longer I wait to do things, the more I am going to regret, so I am finally doing it! I saw a $430 plane ticket to Munich and I’ve always wanted to go and experience the Bavarian culture, so I plugged in the credit card number and bought it! Traveling to Europe alone? I’m either crazy or adventurous, I prefer adventurous. I turn 25 in a couple weeks and it’s time to start living life and not regretting NOT doing things. The way I see it, you always regret the things you don’t do more then the things you do, so why not get out there and live life?

Well that’s it for my first post, pretty boring, but hey, I’m just getting started, perhaps my life will get more exciting soon! (We can hope!)

Cheers, Cathy